The distractions on this page should give you enough time to think of another way to procrastinate so you don't end up actually doing whatever it is you're supposed to be working on right now.

That's what memes were built for anyways: to keep us from being productive so our alien overlords can swoop in and tickle our brains to death. Then we restart the simulation and wake up in a Subway bathroom in New Jersey.

If you don't believe any of that you can go back and read the Bible, 'cause it's all in there. You just gotta squint real hard and only read backwards. Then you'll find what you're looking for.

And the good news is that if you've made it this far then we succeeded in distracting you again. Now you got a distraction from work and a distraction from your distraction. Bravo.

Click here to feel like a real man.